May 17, 2013

My Goal

I am taking a goal class. This is a pretty cool class. We get to learn awesome tools, ideal for assisting us in attaining our desired results. The first two weeks are about planning. Getting clear on what I want, when I want it, why I want it, some steps and of course setting up support. I've been to 2 classes now.

My goal is basically about clearing out room for a new romagic relationship. (That's romance+magic!) I have found that a part of my goal is to consciously choose to live from my authentic self, for a significant period of time. This will mean clearing out false beliefs and remembering the real me. Since it is so closely related to the theme of my site I thought it would be fun to post a little each week about how I'm doing with my goal.

The first week, I was rocking. I was figuring out my goal. Figuring out my whys and finding more whys. It was awesome. I was so enthusiastic. I only had one moment that I was actually considering cutting it back to a smaller goal. I knew that this was typical of my sabotaging methods so I stuck with it.

The second class was going awesome. Someone called out a comment on something I had said. It threw me for a loop. "What you see that as that behavior?" went through my head. Then later I was stuck. See my original goal wasn't measurable. It was fantastic but without measure-ability how do you know when you've hit it? I wasn't even bothered by this. I knew it would come. Then another person mentioned some traits they saw me showing up with.

I broke down. I was feeling like no one ever sees the real me. This is a common theme in my life. It doesn't even matter if there is any truth to what people see. This is my belief, my perception. How can I create my ideal relationship when I am not even really showing up as me? The good news is this break down lead me to clarity on my goal. YAY!

The next step was to then find a belief to change. I did. My new belief is, "The real me is likable." To assist me in remembering, I decided to draw a picture of me and label it with many of the traits I see in me. I've included it here! Not bad for many years of not sketching, eh? Look at all those traits. How can the real me not be likable if all those things are me?

Anyway, I'm only a day into this second week. I'm up against some interesting challenges. One being asking for help! :) I say, "Bring it on!"

4 comments:

  1. Asking for help is a BIG challenge for me and for several of my gal pals. Why do you think women can have such difficulty in asking for assistance and support?

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    1. I think it's because our nature as women, who are designed to become mothers, is one of care taking. Then we add to it some long term beliefs that have been floating around, probably since the beginning of time. Sometimes, it's about not wanting to put others out. Sometimes, it's about rejection. There are a lot of things that can play into. Sometimes I forget that I wasn't meant to do everything myself! It'll be interesting to see what other kinds of beliefs are hanging around in my head.

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  2. Asking for help IS a challenge for so many people? I am on that list. Are we afraid to be seen as incapable or weak? When I break it all down I know that logically I can't do it all. But that doesn't mean I don't try. Cause I do. I have been really learning about myself and how I see help. The journey is far from over but what I have learned each time I have "sucked it up" is that it feels so much better to have help than to struggle alone. Its getting easier. A person with so many likeable traits as you will figure this part out too. 100%

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    1. Thanks Kate! Didn't you just blog about a similar thing a week or two ago? Yup, just found it: http://katelindsaylifecoaching.blogspot.ca/2013/04/asking-for-help-can-be-tough-to-master.html

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